Beginner’s Mind is a special project collecting insightful essays written by US college students who have attended experiential-learning courses related to Buddhism. Some of the authors identify as Buddhists, for others it is their first encounter with the Buddhadharma. All are sharing reflections and impressions on what they’ve learned, how it has impacted their lives, and how they might continue to engage with the teaching.
VySa Nguyen wrote this essay for her Buddhist Economics course at Trinity College in Hartford, Connecticut. She is a student from Vietnam pursuing a degree in Computer Science and Economics with a minor in Asian Studies. Outside of her academic pursuits, VySa enjoys crocheting and tending to her houseplants.
Brutally Frugal to Reluctantly Indulgent: How the US Is Changing My Spending Habits
Growing up, I never had the inclination to ask my parents for anything. One of my earliest memories of indirectly requesting something was when I was around four or five years old, peering through my cousin’s window, hoping to catch the last few moments of Sailor Moon CDs playing on the TV. To my surprise, on the way home, my dad stopped at a store and encouraged me to pick out some CDs. This unexpected gesture puzzled me.
I never knew why I was so frugal growing up, but reflecting on my upbringing, I realized I had developed a habit of refraining from asking for material possessions and prioritizing familial and financial responsibilities. My mindset, perhaps, stemmed from the Buddhist and Confucian values of filial piety, akin to the principles outlined in the Adiya Sutta, where the first benefit of wealth was deemed to be providing for one’s family:
He provides his mother & father with pleasure & satisfaction, and maintains that pleasure rightly. He provides his children, his wife, his slaves, servants, & assistants with pleasure & satisfaction, and maintains that pleasure rightly. This is the first benefit that can be obtained from wealth. (Adiya Sutta)
However, after moving to the US and becoming financially independent, my perspective shifted. The wealth I attain is no longer provided by my parents; it is earned through my own endeavors. And while I have maintained a frugal approach out of respect for the values instilled in me, I find myself indulging in personal purchases more frequently.
Despite this, I try to remain mindful of my spending, opting for thrift stores and sales to save money. Nevertheless, in the prevalent consumerist culture of America, I sometimes succumb to impulsive spending, straying from the principles I have told myself to uphold. This internal struggle leads me to question the societal norms surrounding wealth and consumption.
Ayn Rand’s philosophies state that “it’s OK to be selfish, greedy, and self-interested, especially in business, and that a win-at-all-costs mentality is just the price of changing the norms of society.” (Duggan 2019, 88) This philosophy, to me, does not apply in the context of the neoliberalist capitalistic economy of the US but in my family’s economy, where I view myself as the rich, now wanting to be more selfish. In the pursuit of financial independence, I find myself caught between the pressure to conform to American consumerism and my commitment to familial responsibility.
The dichotomy between frugality and indulgence created a sense of isolation from my peers, who embraced a more carefree approach to spending. Yet, amid the allure of material possessions, I yearned to reconnect with the mindful child who was too scared to even ask her dad to buy some CDs. Navigating this balance between personal desires and familial obligations remains a constant struggle, as I strive to uphold the values of both cultures that have shaped my identity thus far.
References
Adiya Sutta: Benefits to be Obtained (from Wealth). AN 5:41. https://www.dhammatalks.org/suttas/AN/AN5_41.html
Duggan, Lisa. 2019. “I Found a Flaw,” in Mean Girl: Ayn Rand and the Culture of Greed, 77–90. Berkeley, CA: University of California Press.
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